Q&A WITH THE SPEAKERS | A Sharing About Children: The Adult Environment – The Foundational Ground in the First Three Years of Life

Q&A WITH THE SPEAKERS | A Sharing About Children: The Adult Environment – The Foundational Ground in the First Three Years of Life

In Session 1 of the Montessori Vietnam Conference Series 2025–2026, many parents raised very practical questions:

“When parents are busy with work, living far from extended family, or when multigenerational households hold different views… how can we prepare a truly harmonious adult environment for children aged 0–3?”

Speakers Julia Hilson and Kavya Chandrasekhar offered profound insights grounded in Montessori 0–3 principles, thoughtfully connected to the realities of Vietnamese families today.

1. The primary caregiver – the foundation of early security

Observations by Dr. Silvana Montanaro in Understanding the Human Being, together with Bowlby’s attachment theory, affirm:

“In the first three years of life, what a child needs most is a stable and responsive primary caregiver.”

In Australia, many mothers experience exhaustion or postpartum depression due to a lack of support. In contrast, in India, multigenerational families often help mothers recover after birth, allowing children to grow up with greater calm and security.

What truly matters is not the number of caregivers, but consistency and stability.

2. Family order shapes the child’s inner order

Maria Montessori emphasized in The Absorbent Mind that children absorb everything from their environment.

When a family experiences fewer conflicts, harmonious interactions, and a stable daily rhythm, children naturally develop concentration, independence, and a sense of security.

Susan Stephenson (The Joyful Child) describes this as:
“Outer order nurturing inner order.”

3. Adults are the child’s emotional environment

Children learn how to live through the emotional states of adults:

• An anxious mother → an unsettled child

• Stressed adults → children who cry easily

• Calm, respectful family relationships → children who are more emotionally stable and cooperative

At the 0–3 stage, children do not analyze — they absorb.

The Absorbent Mind and Feldman’s (2007) research on emotional contagion both show that children mirror the emotions of their caregivers.

4. Multigenerational Vietnamese families: a precious asset when aligned in Montessori spirit

In Vietnam, grandparents are a wonderful source of support. However, differing viewpoints can sometimes lead to inner confusion for the child.

In Montessori from the Start, Lillard & Jessen recommend:

“Adults should agree on a few core principles: how to respond when a child cries, whether to force eating, how to respect sleep and the child’s natural rhythm…”

One young family applied this approach very effectively:

They kept warm family dinners, scheduled weekly video calls with grandparents, and avoided arguments in front of their child. With just a few small adjustments, they preserved a deeply Vietnamese sense of warmth within a modern lifestyle.

5. Living separately or together — the key remains: communication, respect, and shared understanding

Maria Montessori once said:

“Children grow through their environment, not through words.”

What children truly need is:

• One stable caregiver

• Adults who communicate kindly with one another

• A peaceful family atmosphere

• A warm, consistent emotional environment

This is the Prepared Environment for children aged 0–3 — and a way for Vietnamese families to both integrate globally and preserve a tradition of loving connection.

Recommended resources for interested parents

• AMI 0–3 – montessori-ami.org 

• Montessori 0–3 Course – montessori.org.vn

• The Absorbent Mind – Maria Montessori

• Understanding the Human Being – Silvana Montanaro

• Montessori from the Start – Paula Polk Lillard

• The Joyful Child – Susan Stephenson

• The Montessori Baby – Simone Davies & Junnifa Uzodike

For any questions or further support, please contact the center via Hotline: 038 601 0168.